How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
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