She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize