I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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