Don't you send me to vm
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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