But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize