Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You had me at "let me see your balls"
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
