and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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