I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Randomize
