lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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