Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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