Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
