Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Randomize