I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize