I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize