No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
