after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize