I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize