Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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