I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
