I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
