i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
