you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
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Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize