apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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