Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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