i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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