so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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