it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
You can't special order awesome
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
