oh god the rape fog is back!
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
