i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
