Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
what day is it and did you see me today?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
