When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
