dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize