im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
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