Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
