he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
