In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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