Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
