Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
