hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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