We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Randomize
