Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
dude. I can hear the air.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
