good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
