I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
