Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize