The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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