its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
