So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize