i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
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