He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
