Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Randomize
